How to Help Your Anxious Child Manage the Anxiety of Making Friends

For many children, making friends comes naturally and effortlessly. However, for children with anxiety, the process of forming new friendships can be overwhelming and stressful. As a parent, it's essential to understand and support your child in managing their anxiety, particularly when it comes to social situations.

In this blog post, we will explore various strategies and techniques that can help your anxious child navigate the challenges of making friends and develop healthy social connections.


Open Communication

The first step in helping your anxious child is to create an open and supportive environment for communication. Encourage your child to express their fears and concerns about making friends. Active listening and empathy play a crucial role in understanding their perspective and validating their feelings.


Normalize Anxiety

Let your child know that anxiety is a common emotion and that many children experience it. Normalize their anxiety by explaining that it is a natural response to new situations. Assure them that it is okay to feel nervous and that their fears are valid.


Educate your Child

Teach your child about anxiety, its symptoms, and how it can affect their thoughts and feelings. Explain that anxiety does not define them and that it is possible to manage and overcome it. By providing them with knowledge, you empower them to take control of their anxiety.

Child with social anxiety has a play date with a friend after seeing a play therapist in Middlesex NJ for play therapy for anxiety


Gradual Exposure

Encourage your child to face their fears gradually. Start by exposing them to low-pressure social situations, such as playdates with one friend or joining small group activities. As they gain confidence, gradually increase the complexity of social interactions. This incremental approach helps your child build resilience and develop coping strategies.


Role Play

Role-playing is an effective technique to help your child practice social skills and develop confidence. Take turns playing different scenarios where they initiate conversations or join a group of children. Provide constructive feedback and praise their efforts. This practice helps them become more comfortable and prepared for real-life situations.


Encourage Empathy

Teach your child about empathy and the importance of considering other people's feelings. Help them understand that other children may also feel anxious or shy, and that they are not alone in their struggles. Encourage acts of kindness and inclusivity to foster positive social interactions.


Teach Problem-Solving Skills

Help your child develop problem-solving skills to navigate social challenges. Discuss various scenarios and brainstorm possible solutions together. Encourage them to think about different perspectives and alternative ways of resolving conflicts or misunderstandings. Equipping them with these skills will boost their confidence and reduce anxiety in social situations.

child with social anxiety gains confidence after seeing a play therapy in Middlesex NJ for play therapy for social anxiety

Foster Positive Self-esteem

Anxiety can often be fueled by negative self-perception. Encourage and reinforce your child's strengths and achievements. Help them recognize their unique qualities and talents. Building a strong sense of self-worth will provide a solid foundation for social interactions.

Lead by Example

Children learn by observing their parents' behavior. Model healthy social interactions by engaging in positive relationships and demonstrating effective communication skills. Encourage them to observe your interactions and learn from your example.

Seek Professional Help if Needed

If your child's anxiety significantly impacts their daily life and relationships, consider seeking professional help from a child therapist. A play therapist can provide specialized strategies and support tailored to your child's needs.

Helping your anxious child manage the anxiety of making friends requires patience, understanding, and support. By implementing the strategies outlined above, you can empower your child to develop the necessary skills to navigate social situations successfully. Remember, each child is unique, and progress may vary. Celebrate small victories and maintain an encouraging atmosphere. With time and practice, your child can overcome their anxiety and build meaningful friendships that contribute to their overall well-being.



Janine Kelly, MSW, LCSW, RPT, CATP, ADHD-CCSP, CCATP-CA is a Registered Play Therapist, Certified EMDR Therapist, and Perinatal Mental Health Therapist in Middlesex, NJ. Janine specializes in childhood anxiety, childhood OCD, childhood trauma, and supporting children who experience neurodivergence such as ADHD and Autism. She also specializes in pregnancy and postpartum mood disorders such as anxiety, panic disorder, OCD, depression, and Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

*This blog is not a substitute for therapy. To schedule an appointment, please click below.

Janine Kelly Play Therapist and Perinatal Mental Health Therapist in Middlesex NJ for childhood anxiety, childhood OCD, childhood trauma, childhood ADHD, childhood Autism, Pregnancy and Postpartum Anxiety and Depression
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