How to Support Your Child with Selective Mutism

Child with selective mutism doesn't speak at school and sees a play therapist for play therapy for selective mutism in Middlesex NJ

Selective Mutism is an anxiety disorder that affects a significant number of children, making it challenging for them to speak in certain situations or around specific individuals. It can hinder a child's social and academic development, affecting their self-esteem and overall well-being.

This blog provides effective strategies that parents can employ to assist their child with Selective Mutism in their journey toward communication and self-expression.


Create a Supportive Environment

It is crucial to create a safe and supportive environment for children with selective mutism. You can do this by promoting open communication and empathy and by establishing a non-judgmental atmosphere where the child feels accepted and valued. Building a positive relationship with your child is important, so be patient, understanding, and respectful. Encouraging other children to be inclusive and empathetic will also help create a sense of belonging.


Gradual Exposure and Desensitization

Gradual exposure is an essential technique to help children with Selective Mutism gradually overcome their anxiety. Begin with low-pressure situations, such as one-on-one conversations with a trusted individual. Gradually introduce more challenging scenarios, such as speaking in a small group or answering questions in class. You can use desensitization techniques, such as role-playing or interactive games, to familiarize the child with speaking in different settings.


Boy with selective mutism uses pictures to communicate after seeing a child therapist in middlesex nj for play therapy for selective mutism and anxiety


Communication Alternatives

While the main goal is to help the child speak verbally, it can be helpful to offer other ways of communication in the beginning stages of intervention. Visual aids like pictures, flashcards, or gestures can make communication easier. You can also encourage written communication by providing journals, notebooks, or online platforms where the child can express their thoughts and feelings.


seek help from a Play Therapist

Play Therapists focus on building a strong therapeutic relationship with the child. By providing a nurturing and accepting environment, they create a space where the child feels comfortable and secure. Play Therapists are trained to use various play-based techniques to help children express their thoughts and feelings. Through activities like puppet play, role-playing, art, and sandtray therapy, the Play Therapist can facilitate the child's expression and gradually encourage verbal communication.

Child with selective mutism learns techniques to manage their anxiety after seeing a play therapist in Middlesex NJ for play therapy for selective mutism

Play Therapists can also address the underlying anxiety associated with Selective Mutism. They can help the child identify and manage their anxieties through play, providing relaxation techniques, deep breathing exercises, and sensory-based activities that promote self-regulation and emotional well-being.

Building social skills is crucial for children with Selective Mutism to feel more comfortable and confident in social interactions. Play Therapy can also target the development of social skills. The child therapist can introduce activities that promote turn-taking, sharing, collaboration, and problem-solving. Through play interactions, the child learns appropriate social behaviors and gains confidence in engaging with others.

Play Therapists can also teach assertiveness and self-advocacy skills, empowering the child to express their needs and desires effectively. Play Therapists often involve parents in the therapeutic process. They provide guidance and support to parents, helping them understand their child's needs, learn effective communication strategies, and create a play-friendly environment at home. By working collaboratively, parents can reinforce the progress made in therapy and continue supporting their child's development.



Supporting children with Selective Mutism requires a comprehensive and individualized approach that addresses their unique needs. By creating a supportive environment, implementing gradual exposure, offering alternative forms of communication, and seeking help from a Play Therapist, we can help children with Selective Mutism find their voice and thrive.

Remember, each child's journey is unique, and progress may take time. Patience, understanding, and consistent support are essential throughout the process. With the right strategies and a network of caring individuals, children with Selective Mutism can overcome their challenges, gain confidence, and develop the skills they need to express themselves confidently in a variety of social situations.


Janine Kelly, MSW, LCSW, RPT, CATP, ADHD-CCSP, CCATP-CA is a Registered Play Therapist, Certified EMDR Therapist, and Perinatal Mental Health Therapist in Middlesex, NJ. Janine specializes in childhood anxiety, childhood OCD, childhood trauma, and supporting children who experience neurodivergence such as ADHD and Autism. She also specializes in pregnancy and postpartum mood disorders such as anxiety, panic disorder, OCD, depression, and Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

*This blog is not a substitute for therapy. To schedule an appointment, please click below.

Janine Kelly Play Therapist and Perinatal Mental Health Therapist in Middlesex NJ for childhood anxiety, childhood OCD, childhood trauma, childhood ADHD, childhood Autism, Pregnancy and Postpartum Anxiety and Depression
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